Pit Chat: Go home Formula 1, you’re drunk

Our heads still hurt trying to pick apart everything from the Azerbaijan Grand Prix but, as headaches go, this is one we will gladly have every race weekend.
Where to start?!
Under pressure
Jolyon Palmer was the victim of more bad luck as he continues his increasingly desperate search for much-needed points. A fuel leak ruled him out of qualifying and a race retirement on lap 7 followed. But, he still didn’t do himself any favours.
Take this petulant interview for example…
.@JennieGow gets a prickly response in her interview with @RenaultSportF1 driver Jolyon Palmer.
Cue a long pause…#F1#AzerbaijanGP pic.twitter.com/mcg9Ra5O7C
— BBC 5 live Sport (@5liveSport) June 22, 2017
And if that wasn’t bad enough, there was this rather embarrassing moment…
Then Turn 8 in FP2 happened…
Be gentle guys… Jolyon helping the marshals out with the car's recovery.#AzerbaijanGP #FP2 pic.twitter.com/SUZdmEJYsU
— Renault Sport F1 (@RenaultSportF1) June 23, 2017
SOS
But at least Palmer has the full support and sympathy from his team-mate Nico Hulkenberg…
“Not necessarily what works for me will work for him,” said Hulkenberg, when asked by Sky Sports if he can do anything to help (silly question).
“I think as a driver you have to find and develop your own way and get yourself in happy place with the car, so there is not much I can do.”
In other words: Sink or swim, buddy.
What’s all the fuss about?
Given how the race unfolded, it can be easy to forget that FP2 was also very eventful as drivers struggled with the concept that Turn 8 was actually a turn and not a straight down to a separate track.
As car after car ran off, we can’t help but wonder what all the fuss was about down there…
Ah, that explains it!
Pretty in pink
Formula 1 fashionista Esteban Ocon asked for opinions about his new race overalls for Baku and opinions is what he got. The replies under this tweet made for excellent viewing.
New suit colors what do you think ?????? #BakuGP @F1 @ForceIndiaF1 @MercedesAMG pic.twitter.com/bCdCUBWkoC
— Esteban Ocon (@OconEsteban) June 22, 2017
After weighing up exactly what he reminds us of, we have come to this definitive conclusion.
Tease me, tease me
Force India are having trouble seizing opportunities on the track of late, but they are certainly on the ball off it…
Pink, grey and white.
We approve, @alo_oficial, we approve.#rumours ? pic.twitter.com/7Z6FOIpFsx— Sahara Force India (@ForceIndiaF1) June 22, 2017
Alonso section
Whilst on the subject of Alonso, he was involved so much over the weekend that we have been left with no option to give him his very own section in this Pit Chat.
First came the usual retirement (but thankfully just in practice this time). Wonder how much Alonso wanted the car to keep rolling all the way into the Caspian Sea?
@SkySportsF1 Comical scene as Alonso asks Azerbaijani marshall "Did you remember to put the handbrake on?" He replies "above my pay grade!" pic.twitter.com/eR5eJDyNSQ
— Rocky the King (@RTKafc_insider) June 23, 2017
A tangle with Ricciardo in qualifying then brought this wonderful comment…
Alonso: “Our speed is that slow that they think we are on a slow lap but no this is our speed, we are starting a timed lap so they get surprised a bit.”
And even before he managed to collect both his and McLaren-Honda’s first points of the season, we reckon he knows who he is going to be racing for next season. He was far too happy all weekend long.
Eric Boullier: “Most painful weekend I’ve ever had.”
Fernando Alonso: “It’s been quite positive for me.”
He was spotted getting into a Mercedes after all…
Picture perfect
We interrupt our regular schedule to bring you some breaking news: Kevin Magnussen does not like oysters.
Thank God there were no more photos released after this point. It looks like it’s going to get a little bit messy.
Eat your words
What will also be proving difficult to swallow are the following words from Dutch TV Ziggo Sport. At one point in FP2, Lance Stroll was running as high as P4…
“Take a picture, pin it on the wall above your bed. That won’t happen often.”
After Sunday, it is probably time to start redecorating the house with Stroll ‘shoey’ wallpaper. The second image in particular will look great as a feature wall.
STR: "This is going to scar me for life…" ?
? ➡️ ? = ? #AzerbaijanGP ?? pic.twitter.com/So1WPGp2eT
— Formula 1 (@F1) June 25, 2017
Wheel of misfortune
We always look forward to Kimi Raikkonen’s contribution, but him screaming for a steering wheel was not the highlight we were expecting this weekend.
Seeing red
Ok, we can’t hold off any longer. Let’s get on to that Lewis Hamilton and Sebastian Vettel moment, although you have to keep reminding Vettel which one…
In case you forget again, Seb, it’s this one…
"When did I do dangerous driving then?" #F1 #AzerbaijanGP #Vettel #VettelBlackFlag #Hamilton pic.twitter.com/4EveZIKesL
— Tom (@predspread) June 25, 2017
The FIA also made us laugh with their official verdict on the incident.
‘Potentially dangerous’. And we suppose the sky is potentially blue.
Oh, Johnny
Vettel’s interview wasn’t the only uncomfortable one. Step forward Johnny Herbert…
Honestly @LewisHamilton has killed me LOOOOOOL. Herbert really tried it. pic.twitter.com/WFnagKKWne
— Chanté ???? (@ChantayyJayy) June 25, 2017
Oh, Ted
And step forward Ted Kravitz, who stirred the pot a little too much this weekend. Here’s Toto Wolff’s reply when Ted tried to chip away at Hamilton’s headrest issue.
Wolff: “I’m not going to blame anybody and I’m not going to let you start to blame anybody… you already have a tendency in your question which I am not accepting.”
Shut. Down.
Last word
You could waste an entire day trying to describe the Azerbaijan Grand Prix; turns out Daniel Ricciardo can capture it pretty well.
Well butter my butt and call me a biscuit that was a race
— Daniel Ricciardo (@danielricciardo) June 25, 2017
Roll on Austria.